Sippy Cup – Melanie Martinez

Roller derby has a funny way of introducing you to people that are way, way cooler than you’ll ever be.


While the derbyverse prides itself on being a diverse group, I’ve realized that a lot of players are tastemakers – influencers – and just generally “in,” on everything that’s smart.

In the case of this song by Melanie Martinez, I found it via the Facebook of another derby athlete who’s a baller. Homegirl puts me to shame on the track.

…And also when it comes to music taste.

“Sippy Cup” by Melanie Martinez showcases both her entrancing vocal style, as well as a storyteller heart, with brutal lyrics.

Martinez has a funny ability to permeate music and tv without you knowing it; she wrote the theme song for AHS: Freakshow – “Carnival.”

Her quirky style fits flawlessly with the quizzical turns that the show takes, and it’s obvious that she was a solid choice for a featured artist.

Matrinez was also a finalist in The Voice, which I found surprising for such a genuine artist.  (Given that singing reality shows feature cookie-cutter artists that slip back into obscurity after a few releases.)

I feel like Martinez has the sass and know-how to avoid that fate, though. The girl wrote her whole album, conceived the character Cry Baby (modeled after the insult she’d received her whole life) and had a 19 year-old friend create all of the artwork for it.

When you look further into her aesthetic, Martinez truly has evolved, even since her tenure on The Voice.

With babydoll outfits complete with giant hair bows, Martinez fits the Blue Velvet intro, as Billboard pointed out. She’s sickly-sweet on the surface, but if you lift the tablecloth, you’ll find gore and guts underneath.

She’s got an air of Lana Del Ray, but surprisingly, with more theatrics. (And less label tampering.)

Whether Martinez’ character Baby Doll can stand the test of time (and growing up) is yet to be seen, but regardless of what direction she takes, this artist will be fun to watch grow. Let yourself become engrossed in her YouTube videos and palatable cooing now, while you’re still considered an early adopter.



Tick Tick Boom – The Hives

Last night when I left practice I was super energized. I left the Chop Shop and the weather was still kinda humid, but had a chill to it. So, I cracked the windows, and BLARED this song. (Don’t tell Brandon. I was driving his car.)

Tick Tick Boom is one of my MANY go-to “happy songs.” And that’s saying something. Because usually when I listen to a song repeatedly, I push myself to the point of hating it. But I haven’t been able to get myself to be weary of this song. And it was released in 2007!

It makes me feel like a badass, but I still have SO much fun at the same time. I feel like that describes a lot of what The Hives bring to the table.

They’re from Sweden, so as expected they’re really efficient: AT ROCKING YOUR FACE OFF. Started in the 90’s, they became well-known in the early 2000’s with the release of the single, “Hate to Say I Told You So.” But “Walk Idiot Walk,” also hit the charts a few years later, and while it had a somewhat smaller impact, it’s still one of my favorites.

But aside from those singles that are more recognizable, my favorite has to be “Abra Cadaver.” It’s faster, harder and…weirder. Give it a listen. Your foot will involuntarily start tapping.

In addition to their major rockage, The Hives are rather dapper. That helps, I suppose, if you care for that kind of thing. Personally, I think time and time again, it’s been shown that if a band has a uniformity of sorts, it makes a bigger impact. Just look at The Ramones. The Beatles. KISS. Daft Punk. Devo. GWAR. ICP. Oh, shit. You see where this is going…


Regardless, whether it makes a good impact or just sticks with you, their aesthetic fits beautifully with their sound. It’s a great pairing on their part, and makes them even more unforgettable.

So, if you’re looking to get amped up and are feel ultra-cool, The Hives are the band to turn to. I’d recommend starting with The Black And White Album (2007) and working your way backward through their catalogue. The Black and White Album is a solid way to get to know their sound and will prep you for their other (more irreverent) work.

Roman Holiday – ETID


Truth is, I’ve listened to Every Time I Die since I was in high school. They’re just that: brutal. And loud, catchy and honest.

I tend to listen to them when I’m really pissed, need to feel like a badass, or get pumped up for something.

Their song Roman Holiday was the opener for their 5th album, New Junk Aesthetic. (And don’t you DARE compare it to that Nicki Minaj song.)

The term “Roman Holiday” has a few meanings. To some, it’s the 1953 movie with Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck. But if you’re not the Turner Classic Movies-type, it can refer to the fact that the Roman Empire took days off for gladiator games. According to Urban Dictionary (which I’m rarely stupid enough to trust) this means it could be loosely linked to the German idea of schadenfreude, or getting enjoyment from someone else’s misfortunes. AKA: It’s the, “I’m an asshole,” term. I’m fine with that.

I listened to this song one night before roller derby practice, and I try to hear it in my head when I’m forced to stand up on the jammer line.

Why, you may ask?

Because I get a Norman Bates-esque smile on my face when I hear the carnage of it.


My favorite lyrics of the song are:

I want the ripened fruit.
I want the fresh meat.
I want the first born.
I want the down beat.

When I hear the guttural scream, “Down beat,” in the song, I imagine taking out everything in my path.

And whether you’re on a war rampage, or playing in your favorite sport, that’s a damned good trigger to have.